Be careful what you wish for.....


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Do not read this book. It is a dangerous book. One that requires a steel gut and at least a lifetime's flirtation with the kind of humour that got Lenny locked up.
It flows in that particularly wicked way, like an anonymous look in a crowded bar that has your mind dragging on a post-coital cigarette before your eyes can even contemplate infidelity. You've read his previous novels, you think you know what to expect, but by page ten the waters are closing in over your head, and you've resigned yourself to the cool detachment that can only come with death. The words on the page, however, are clearly alive. They feed off the darkness inside of you, amplify your growing distrust for humanity. What love you may once have had is now only of the kind laced with pity. Like a child with 3rd degree burns. Everyone feels sorry for it, but no one wants anything to do with it.
A voice from the back of your mind keeps trying to convince you that this is satirical. These events are hyperbole in the extreme, a carefully fashioned blade to cut us from the depths of our slumber. This is hyper-real, it whispers. Nothing like this actually happens. These are urban myths, as dictated by a malevolent reincarnation of Poe. So you close the book and switch on the tv, desperately needing that brand of mindless respite that only television can bring.
And after only 20 minutes, you realise that the book is right. Its stories may not have happened yet, but they will. The absurdity of celebrity will create gods, pop will eat itself. The most quickly evolving human accomplishments originate not from technology or art, but from the depths of our perversion and depravity. Suddenly it's as if the only truth is staring up at you from where you left it on the floor. You start reading it again, and the hallucinations start. You see these characters embodied in those around you, and worse, embodied in yourself. You try to stop yourself from thinking, lest you betray that last notion of righteousness you cling to so tightly. You are a seal in an oil slick, a dolphin in a shark net. The more you struggle, the more entangled you become. The truth will not set you free, it will imprison you.
There is nothing clever about this book. No inspiring conclusion, no bright horizon, no triumph of the human spirit. No twist ending, nor break-through idea or debatable philosophy. It simply gives us a window through which to watch our own autopsy. Our bodies sliced expertly down the middle, every organ tagged and bagged. Can't you feel that? The cold from the slab reaching tendrils through your bones?
No, friends, this author is a madman. He is sick and twisted and must surely be alone. That must be it. And so I cannot reveal his indentity or his works. Should his words spread to any more eyes and ears, we run the risk of finding him sane.


6 Responses to “Be careful what you wish for.....”

  1. Anonymous Fence 

    You are nuttin but a tease, you know that.

  2. Anonymous anne 

    ... like an anonymous look in a crowded bar that has your mind dragging on a post-coital cigarette before your eyes can even contemplate infidelity.
    Wow.

  3. Anonymous Luke Sometimes 

    So you've also found AA Milne a tad disturbing then? I thought it was only me. :)

  4. Anonymous kyknoord 

    Damn! Beaten to the punch by Luke. I was going to say 'Calvin & Hobbes', but it's all good.

  5. Anonymous Nome 

    Now I want to read the book in question. It reminds me a bit of my reaction to Henry Miller's Tropic of Cancer. Also of my reactions to a book of Haruki Murakami's short stories (After the Quake), and to French film called A Ma Soeur.

    Anyway, it was a brilliant and entirely universal piece. I relate to it. Well-done.

  6. Anonymous DreamingWolf 

    Just curious why you think confronting and accepting the dark twisted pathways of one's soul would lead to imprisonment instead of freedom? Would denial of them lead to freedom? Or am I thinking too much about a bit of writing for fun (which I have been known to do)

    And I agree with kyknoord, it sound like 'Calvin & Hobbes'.

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